Screwdrivers, Secrets, and Snowmen

* DEFINITION OF A TOOL: A person who chooses to drive his mid-size SUV onto a big pile of snow, just to get a close parking spot. If the only "sport-utilitying" you do in your Sport Utility Vehicle is this type of activity, you are a tool. You're going to Sunday morning brunch at Mimi's Cafe, for god's sake!

* CONFESSION #1: I cried at the end of the movie "ELF." It just made me happy to see the people believe in Santa and know that the children of the world would once again see toys under the tree.

* CONFESSION #2: My mother was a hippie. I found out a long time ago that she smoked pot during the 70's. Who didn't? But I never understood her reasoning for thinking that pot was safer back then than it is now. That was until she recently confessed to me that she and her friend grew their own pot in the backyard. "Don't worry," she told me. "I threw away all of my paraphenelia soon after you were born." Thanks for the reassurance, Mom.

* Q&A: A child asked me yesterday if I could guess what his father's name is. I told him I didn't know what it was. "Me, either!" he exclaimed. "Because I never met him!" Mmmm-kay...

* JOKE: How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed? You wake up wet...

1 comment:

Blogarita said...

Confession #1: My older brother is still a hippie.