9.17.2006

Yes, this is the best I've got...

Why do I feel like I am constantly apologizing for not having anything worthy to blog? I am aware that the content found on this blog recently has been substandard. (What? There's a standard? Sh!t...) Anyway, here goes nothin'...**

Yesterday, while waiting for my Chai Latte at the local coffee shop, I began to look at some of the artwork on the walls. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a man in his mid-twenties sitting on the couch with a pacifier in his mouth. I automatically made sure not to make eye contact and started concentrating very hard on the photo on the wall. But, then the freak spoke. Nonchalantly, he took the pacifier from his mouth and asked: "Do you have the time?" I glanced at my watch, told him the time and walked away. I made
Dave walk by the guy to verify that I wasn't imagining things... I wasn't. I still am not quite sure what to make of this whole experience, but somehow, I feel a little bit violated.

Overheard conversation between two first grade students:
Boy: Did you see what they did on the playground?
Girl: No! What?
Boy: You know that big slide that goes down the hill?
Girl: (Nods.)
Boy: They took it out!
Girl: (Shocked look.) What?... Well, did they
replace it with anything?
Boy: Nope. (Shakes head sadly.) They just covered it with mulch.

People always think that flying cars would be such a great solution to the traffic problems that cause us such frustration in our lives. But, unless you live in the middle of nowhere and are able to have your own runway, we're all going to have to wait in line just to take off anyway, because, seriously, you know that they won't be able to build more than like one or two runways in each city. There's just no room. So, even though you won't have to wait at stop lights, you're still going to have to sit there and be pissy with all the jerks in front of you who aren't paying attention to when it is their turn to go.

RED BULL: Nectar of the Gods or Spooge of Satan?

Every year, our group of friends goes on a
float trip. We are pretty dedicated and will probably carry this tradition well into the future. You know how camping trips end up... There are beer bottles and cigarette butts littering the entire campsite. Won't it be funny when in forty years or so we're all still going on the annual float trip, but in the mornings when we wake up, in addition to all the other stuff, we'll get out of our tents and have to search the plastic cups sitting on the picnic table for the one that is holding our dentures? Sure do hope nobody puts a cigarette out in one of those cups. Gross. (Some of us will reach this juncture sooner than others...)

**Disclaimer: In no way am I saying that anything written in this post meets the standard. It is just more of the same...

5 comments:

Dave Morris said...

Duh. Flying cars will take off vertically.

Sheesh. Chicks.

Fantastagirl said...

a pacy? He was sucking on a pacifier? ewww!

Anonymous said...

I don't know if this is right, or how I even know this, but I think the pacifier has something to do with the subculture of kids who go to raves. Maybe somebody can verify that?

Anonymous said...

I was close. I asked Artsy Girl; she said it has to do with the people who use Ecstacy (sometimes at raves). Wiki confirms it.

Undercover Mother said...

Just being alive is reason enough to blog. Seriously, getting to blog tomorrow isn't a guarantee. But somehow "blog like there's nobody reading" doesn't feel the same as "dance like there's nobody watching."