Guilt

Other than my rather unhealthy addiciton to American Idol, I try to stay away from reality television as a general rule. I watched the first season of Survivor (remember Richard Hatch?) and season two of America's Next Top Model. Other than that, though, I've stayed away.

Until tonight.

Dave's out enjoying a "Guys' Night Out." Sparky is sleeping soundly in his crib. I'm eating leftover tuna casserole, scrolling through the channel guide since nothing is on the DVR because all the shows are in reruns for the holidays. And, I come across this:

Momma's Boys on NBC *

I watched the entire thing. And, I set it to record the entire series.

Maybe it has to do with the fact that I just finished a class on Family Systems Theory and the dynamics of watching three young men try to find a romantic partner while their helicopter mothers monitor their every move is intriguing to me. (Enmeshment much? Thanks, Minuchin.)

Maybe it has to do with the one mother who overtly came out and said that she does not approve of any Black, Jewish, Muslim, or Asian girl for her son. Only a White, Catholic girl from an undivorced family will do. (And people like to say that racism no longer exists in our country!)

Or maybe it's the guilty pleasure of wanting to watch the cat fights as 32 young women fight over 3 men.

Don't tell anyone, okay?

*You'll never guess who is the exec producer, though...

Embracing my inner dork...

As a new Facebook junkie (thanks a lot, Paula), I've recently come into contact with a lot of people from my past. The experience has definitely caused some introspection.

When I think back on high school or the potential high school reunion, I tend to cringe. There were a lot of people there that didn't "get me." And, for that matter, I didn't "get them," either. Society had taught me that I should be able discern what to wear, what music to like, what to say, and how to act in order to fit in with this particular crowd. But, I was always really too consumed with my own world to figure out what those things were and always seemed to be baffled by the fact that I couldn't quite put all the pieces together.

At this point in my life, I'm secure enough to admit some things that, in my earlier years, I would have been mortified to share. Quirky things that some people may not expect, but I am no longer ashamed to put out there, because, well, they're just "me."

For example - The magazines I subscribe to are: Psychology Today, Gifted Child Today, Cooking Light, The Journal of Counseling and Development, and Scrapbooks, Etc. (No gossip magazines or current events... Although, I used to get Entertainment Weekly and Time.) I get excited when I see them in my mailbox and love to relax in the bathtub, reading an article about current trends in counseling or scrapbooking techniques.

One of my favorite genres of music is Broadway. Along those sides, I love musical theatre. There is something about the integration of music and plot that somehow transcends a simple play or movie. Plus, the thrill of a live performance sends chills down my spine.

I love going to school. I like writing papers. I enjoy the challenge of studying for a test. I thrive on the stress of waiting for grades to be posted. After I finish my master's degree that I am working on now (my second, for the record), I hope to earn my Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology.

Interesting how once I write these things down, they really seem like no big deal. But, I'll be honest - these are things that I sometimes worry about sharing with people. Like, I'm not really as "cool" as I try to act. You'd think that ten years out of high school, I would no longer worry about what other people think of me... But, like everyone else (I hope), I do. I'm proud of the fact that I'm willing to put those things out there for all those people from my past, dorky or not.